They Both Knew
by ruji
Summary: They both had special someones in their hearts. And they both knew. Yet they both got together. Now's the time they both came to an end. [shounen-ai. AtobeOshitari. songfic.]


Alright, i guess this is what you call a songfic? Never done something like this before, giving it a shot now. Please be kind a leave me a review after you read. Sankyuu!

Disclaimer: Do not own the characters, do not own the song. poor me.  
Song: That's Why (You Go Away) - Michael Learns to Rock

(words in '...' are thoughts of the character.)  
(words in **bold** are lyrics from the song.)

**They Both Knew**

Slamming his locker door, Oshitari grabbed his things and ran out of the clubroom, almost knocking over a junior in the process. The remaining people in the clubroom stared dumbfounded. It was rare to see their coolheaded resident tensai lose his cool. A moment later, Mukahi too gathered his belongings and left the room hurriedly. Shishido mumbled something about their doubles pair being so synchronized they had mood swings together, and the others went about their own business. The buzz in the clubroom died down as the room was emptied.

Oshitari stopped at the school driveway, just in time to stop Atobe before the captain stepped into the waiting car. The navy-haired boy dragged his captain to a secluded corner and held out a white envelope, clutching it so tightly it almost bunched into a ball of paper.

"Keigo, what is this about?"

"Didn't you read? I wrote it clearly in the letter. I want to break up with you."

"You could have just told me. It's unlike you to do wishy-washy things like writing letters."

"Ore-sama felt like writing, is there a problem with that?"

For awhile, the both of them stood there in silence. Even the usual smooth talker Oshitari was lost for words. He took a deep breath to regain his composure and stared intensely at Atobe.

"**Baby won't you tell me why, there is sadness in your eyes? I don't wanna say goodbye to you.**"

"**Life is one big illusion, I should try to forget. But there is something left in my head.**"

"**You're the one who set it up. Now you're the one to make it stop.**"

"**I'm the one who's feeling lost right now.**"

"You? More like _I'm_ the one feeling lost. Out of the blue I find a letter in my locker from you telling me you want a breakup, when just yesterday you were holding me in your arms while we watched that romance flick."

"I'm sorry, Yuushi. I can't let this go on anymore. _You know._ Just… forget everything. Ok?"

"**Now you want me to forget every little thing you said. But there is something left in my head.** Sometimes I wish I didn't know…"

"Yuushi, we can't keep deceiving ourselves. It won't work out."

He had never felt so upset, hurt, and anguish in his life. And right now all of it was running through his blood, all at the same time, burning his blood vessels. He felt as if his body was tearing apart. Sometimes it really wasn't a good thing to be a tensai. Knowing too many things hurt. He knew right from the start Atobe's heart belonged to someone else. And he knew Atobe was using him as a replacement. But he still threw himself in. He knew their relationship would hurt them both in the long run. But he stubbornly hoped that things would change with time. He grabbed the captain and kissed him roughly and deeply. For one last time.

"**I won't forget the way you're kissing. The feelings so strong, were lasting for so long. But I'm not the man your heart is missing. That's why you go away, I know.**"

* * *

Oshitari gave Atobe a slight push and looked away, silently asking Atobe to leave. The mauve-haired boy's vision lingered on the tensai for awhile, then he turned around and walked off in silent understanding. Oshitari looked up and watched as the walking figure disappeared from sight, then slumped to the ground and leaned against a tree. He laughed painfully at his foolishness.  
'**You were never satisfied, no matter how I try. Now you wanna say goodbye to me. Life is one big illusion, I should try to forget. But there is something left in my head.**'

* * *

Atobe got into the car and ordered his chauffer to drive off. He looked out of the window and watched as the scenery outside zoom past in a blur. He smiled wistfully, thinking his relationship with Oshitari was just like the scenery. 

They were both foolish. Oshitari was a great friend, and a good boyfriend as well, but the love he showered on the bespectacled tensai was never directed at the boy himself. He just needed someone to reciprocate the love he had to offer. And he knew Oshitari was aware of that. They were both willing to get hurt. He could tell that Oshitari really did put love into their relationship. But he could also see, that there was another person who had taken Oshitari's heart without said boy realizing himself. In simple terms, Atobe wasn't exactly who Oshitari loved. It was just that Oshitari hadn't realized who his heart was longing. If the tensai was really that much in love with the captain, he wouldn't have allowed Atobe to simply end the relationship like that, Atobe knew.

Atobe leaned back and told the chauffer to turn up the volume of the music, hoping the soothing elements of classical music would calm his mind.  
'**I won't forget the way you're kissing. The feelings so strong, were lasting for so long. But I'm not the man your heart is missing. That's why you go away, I know.**'

* * *

Oshitari looked up at the rapidly darkening sky. The blue sky was now tinted with hues of yellow. The sun was setting. He had calmed down a lot sitting under that tree. But he still couldn't help feeling lost. It was as if something important was taken away from him, but strangely, he wasn't feeling that sad anymore. Just a few moments ago he felt as if he had a lot to say to Atobe before he let their relationship come to an end. But now, he couldn't recall a single thing that he had wanted to say.  
'**Sitting here all alone in the middle of nowhere. Don't know which way to go. There ain't so much to say now between us. There ain't so much to say… ain't so much to say.**' 

He got up and dusted his pants, picking up his tennis bag, he started walking home. He still felt a tinge of sadness, but he knew all he needed was a good night's sleep. All of a sudden, his relationship with Atobe didn't seem like that much of a big deal anymore. Tomorrow would be a brand new day, and Atobe and him would still be great friends, he knew. That was the way their actual relationship worked.

* * *

Stepping out of the shadows, Mukahi watched as his doubles partner walked further and further away. For some reason, a part of him felt like crying. He didn't like what he saw. A deflated Oshitari wasn't appealing at all. Seeing the sullen look on the navy-haired boy's face made his heart twist and wrench. But another part of him was happy and fluttering. He felt as if a heavy load had been taken off his shoulders. Slinging his tennis bag over his shoulder, he too started his walk home. 

end-

* * *

A/N: There might be a second part to it, there might not. Depends on the plot bunnies in my head, and also on how well this chapter is received. All comments welcomed. Thanks for reading, ja! 


End file.
